Overpowering?

I woke up this morning to an overpowering stench coming from the kitchen ... first thing I did was step outside (suspecting the neighbors or a sewer leak, yes, it stank that bad). No smell there. Went back in to my apartment, phew! Something for sure was turning the air purple and green and peeling the wallpaper! I had to find the source, for time was limited -- while I could still see (the vitriol in the air was eating away at my corneas, slowly dissolving them). Come to realize it was coming from our cat. Did I feed it anything unusual? No -- not me -- but remembered my cousin was over last night. After digging around in the kitchen trash sure enough I found ... two great big cans of Hormel mild chili! These were two BIG, Sams Club sized cans, and I know she couldn'tve eaten all this .. so guess who got the rest! Plech. Next time you get to keep BlazeYaDead with you for at least the next 72 hours.

You know you're just a little too wrapped up in Facebook when, Part II, the Sequel

...when... you look for the Like button on ___ to share that you're ___ :

your dashboard :: stuck in traffic (and no, you don't have a smartphone built into your car)
the cop :: getting pulled over and getting a ticket
the faucet :: thirsty
your 3rd can of Guinness :: thirsty
the toilet :: you tried to send what you thought was just a text based email but it had a streaming attachment on it and you didn't know it








cheers,
a11

You know you've been on Facebook just a wee bit too much WHEN...

You know you have been on Facebook* just a little bit too much when -- you automatically look for the Like button on ______ when you are __________ :

Fill in the blanks with:

1. your coffee cup :: at Starbucks
2. the nurse call button :: in bed at the hospital
3. your desk :: working
4. by your dinner plate :: having dinner at home
5. on your burger wrapper :: having a Big Mac for lunch
   
6. your TV (plain vanilla one, not one of those smart ones) :: watching Glee
   
7. [CENSORED] :: in the restroom
8. your shoe :: tying your laces
9. the bottom of Tweetie's birdcage :: cleaning it out
10. the pavement on the street :: you find a dollar bill
    
11. the cash register :: at your favorite store in the mall checking out
12. your beer glass :: at the bar
13. your [second|third|...] can of "211" :: receiving yet another revelation from that great Static Entity with no mass, no wavelength...
14. your forehead :: doing just about anything
15. your bedpost :: "after" with your lover
    
16. on the cross :: chanting 'Look on the brighter side of life / look on the brighter side of life'

Cheers,
a11